I was considering that my grandchildren really have no idea of what "clicking" clocks are, except perhaps as historic memorabilia. They have no idea of "ringing in the New Year" with Guy Lombardo nor do they have any attraction or recognition of that type of music. I was listening to Frank Sinatra one day and my granddaughter's remark was "Grandma, what are you listening to, he can't even sing!"
As life keeps on going we see some changes that are better than before - I actually like digital clocks rather than annoying ticking keeping me awake. I like the idea of solar energy rather than the mess of cords that are all around my bed especially with the addition of all the C-pak paraphenalia. The list is long, but my real concern for this blog is about old age aches and pains.
My 75th year was such a physical disaster that I could not wait for it to end and I would throw it out with the trash and never look back. I hoped and planned on Tuesday, August 14th to awake to a brand new feeling of energy and happiness to be alive and ready for anything.
Alas it is not so. My 76th year has begun and offered me so far a new set of concerns. Not only do I have to try to adjust to a C-Pak - they say you do - but I won't believe it until it actually happens. Now it is very hard to sleep, it hurts, not breathing through my mouth is almost an all night stay awake forcing my lips to stay shut impossibility, the tubing is falling in my face - it goes on and on. But I also have my left leg joint pain in my right leg too now and it seems to be much worse as the night goes on and it burns down into the feet. It also hurts to walk or bend down to lift things.
To top that all off for some reason after 30 years of normal blood pressure readings on the same dose med, my blood pressure is very high and getting higher every day. We are trying a new med to see if it helps.
So, of course, I have been bemoaning all this to the Lord trying to explain to Him that I do not do well if He asks physical trials of me. I've managed the financially strapped one pretty well for the last 50 years and remained totally trusting and strong in my faith. When my dear daughter went through some very hard trials of her own, I also felt Him near encouraging me that she and I would both survive and be the better for it all. It is just pain that seems to do me in.
This morning as I stood up from bed, pain beginning, I grumbled all the way to the bathroom. Then as I leaned down to pick something up, the pain worsened, but I realized very clearly I was not supposed to be grumbling or complaining about it at all. I was supposed to be thanking the Dear Lord and rejoicing in all that He is asking of me every minute of every day. And so I determined then and now to do this. With every ache or high blood pressure reading I am going to thank the Dear Lord and rejoice in all of it believing that His purpose is good and when or if He wants me to know or understand any of it, He will reveal it in time and if not then I will just accept, surrender and be glad.
I just love it when I know the Lord and I are in tune with one another. Lo and behold I sit down to this morning's devotion and which psalm do I read but Psalm 136 :1
O give thanks unto the LORD;
for he is good: for his mercy endureth for ever. (KJV)
Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good,
for his steadfast love endures forever. (ESV)
Both translations are wonderful and make my point perfectly. So I am going to pray, hope and remain grateful every day of my "new" year of life, and in spite of aches or ailments I will be faithfully rejoicing at all times.
